The Ultimate Guide to Starting an Offensive Podcast From Scratch

Stolen image of guys who represent the P Boiz.

I’ve been podcasting for a bit more than three years now, it started as a fun hobby and a way to catch up with my friends, but as the years have gone on it has turned into something that I wish to do more with. It didn’t start as an offensive podcast, but has kind of grown into that, so here’s everything you need to do to go the same route.

RECORDER

If a podcast is made in the woods and no one hears it, is it truly a podcast? Thankfully we have recorders so that those podcasts can be heard. I zoom Podtrack P4 is a popular recorder, but you can use anything from your phone to a different kind of recorder. Using the recorder is a bit difficult if you don’t have…

MICROPHONES

These can get kinda pricy, especially if you need multiple microphones for multiple people. You could always have people double up on the mic for a bit more of an intimate conversation. Just have them sit really close to you, and put the microphone between your two mouths.

CAMERA

Once again, you don’t need to get too fancy with the camera, using something as simple as your phone camera can be good enough. I like using camcorders because they can record longer than regular cameras. I used to have to stop the podcast to start recording again every 20 minutes when using a DSLR, so do be weary of that.

EDITING SOFTWARE

Now if you plan to go the video and audio route, you will need to sync those two together, and there’s literally no other way to do that than by using an editing software. There’s so many of them out there, I use Final Cut because it was the most cost effect for what you get, and I read online David Lynch used Final Cut to edit Inland Empire.

STREAMING ACCOUNT

Ok, so you made the podcast, and unless you just wanna email everyone you know the whole file, you’re gonna need somewhere to post it. So having a YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, etc. account probably makes the most sense if you actually want people to listen to the podcast.

BAD PERSONALITY

No one wants to just have a regular podcast anymore. Every episode needs to have that big controversy. Luckily for me, I’m a bad open micer, so I’m used to unfunny things that will get me in trouble into a microphone. You just have to find what you’re really passionate about, and then figure out a way to imply that everyone who doesn’t feel the same way is retarded.

Congratulations, you’ve started an offensive comedy podcast. The next step would be growing the podcast to where you are making millions of dollars off of it, but I still haven’t figured that part of it out yet. Once I do I’ll let you know.